How to Handle People Who Annoy You

How do you work with people who annoy you? How do you handle them?

Here is a lesson that taught me how to get beyond the annoyance.

I listened to Abraham Lincoln when he once said. “The easiest way to defeat an enemy is to make that enemy your friend.”

Several years ago I met Richard. Richard had a personality that did not mesh with mine. Generally, I am a n easy person to get along with. I do my best to view the best in other people. However, with Richard, I tried to flee the scene whenever he was around. I used annoyance avoidance behaviors to keep out of Richard’s sight.

I planned a large public all day workshop on stress. Since I was personally funding this workshop, I was watching costs very carefully. Richard volunteered to help me sell my products back of the room. Even though I probably seemed annoyed that he asked, I was forced to do the cost effective thing and allow him to help me sell my products.

At the time I had just one product. It was a cassette tape on Overcoming Stress. I had no book or large tape album, just one solitary cassette tape selling for twenty dollars.

When the morning of the workshop arrived, I was very disappointed. My public seminar only drew fifty paid registrants. I decided I would give those fifty people the best I could give even though I knew I would barely break even at the end of the day.

I gave a great workshop. I even answered questions during lunch and breaks, never leaving the stage area for a moment.

Richard was no visible all day because the back of the room selling area was actually a separate room leading to the bathrooms and the parking lot.

Finally, at the end of the day and after all the attendees went home, I sat exhausted on stage. Richard came in from the back of the room area with a big smile on his face.

He said, “Wayne, you look tired.” Do you want to know how many cassettes you sold to your fifty attendees?” Secretly I hoped he wouldn’t tell me, but I said, “Okay Richard, how many did we sell?

Richard said, we sold All OF THEM. We sold three hundred cassettes to just fifty people!

I asked, “How could that happen?” Richard told me, “Every time there was a break and during lunch, attendees passed by and they would purchase several additional tapes for their friends and relatives who couldn’t come to the workshop. This buying frenzy lasted all day while I was working hard on stage.

My disaster turned out to be one of my best business days. It never would have turned out that way unless I overcame my annoyance avoidance behaviors and made Richard my friend.

Today, over twenty years later, Richard and I are still close friends. When I think back, I cannot remember what it was about Richard that annoyed me. In fact all the people who ever annoyed me, I lost that feeling of annoyance. I can remember everything about that workshop many years ago, but remember nothing of what annoyed me in the first place.

As Abraham Lincoln once said, ““The easiest way to defeat an enemy is to make that enemy your friend.”

Remember the Abe’s statement the next time someone annoys you. That person may just surprise you in a very pleasant way!


Wayne F. Perkins
Master Hypnotist Trainer


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My mission in life is to help you achieve your mission in life." Wayne F. Perkins